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Teasing has many meanings, but in the world of BDSM it almost always means producing sexual arousal without the relief of orgasm. Teasing can be foreplay; it can be flirtation; or it can be a major element in a scene, including tease and denial, in which release is either greatly postponed or outright denied.

There are many forms of teasing. Teasing can be verbal: the sexy phone call to the office, the description over dinner at a restaurant of what will happen when you get home, the sexy words of a dominant partner to someone in a tie and tease scene. Or it can be visual: look-but-don't-touch. And it can be physical: long sessions of kissing and necking; stroking, massage, and caresses that come close to the genitals but don't ever quite go there; masturbation of oneself or by another person that is not allowed to go to the point of orgasm; even penetrative sex that is kept within certain limits (such as if a woman straddles a man in cowgirl position and allows him to thrust into her only once every ten seconds).

Beyond all this, teasing can be used in a dominant/submissive situation by changing the rules: making a sub go through certain things expecting a particular reward and then holding it back, or making the sub beg for it. For example, if a couple have established a routine where a submissive woman is used to taking six sets of six spankings as a prelude to sex, her lover might give her the six sets of six and then act, either momentarily or at length, as if no such tradition exists between them.

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