Slave - Personal Experiences - BenHur

BEN HUR'S EXPERIENCE OF BEING A SLAVE

This page I will extend in the forthcoming days in stages, just starting now, please give me time to continue***

I am a slave

I am a slave. I've not always been one, but my deep-rooted desire to become a slave, did exist already since my late teens. It has taken some time since till I got experienced enough in the SM-scene as a bottom to find the courage to get myself turned from a standard sub into a real slave. And, of course, it did take some time after that to find the right dominant as a Master to own me. To make clear what I mean: to my opinion there is a big difference between a bottom and a slave, like there exists between a Top and a Master. A bottom is just acting in a submissive role during a sexual SM-play within a limited amount of time, serving a Top sexually with the possibility to end all when he gets bored of it. A slave on the other hand is not acting temporarily as a submissive in a state of sexual arousal, but is feeling himself a slave all the time, regarding himself to be really the propriety of a Master. Being a slave is not just an issue of external behaviour, but of an internal mindset. Being a slave is the marrow of your personality.

In this respect I agree with the difference made between a submissive and a slave made in this article: http://www.teramis.com/kink/subvslave.htm, linked to the page 'slave' in the Wikipedia: "A submissive renews the choice to submit every time a demand is levied upon him. A slave makes a one-time choice to submit, up front, and thereafter it is incumbent upon him to obey".

Limits of slavery

Also the further explanation by the author of this article contains three essential points, I want to repeat here, because they make the essential contrast between sub and slave clear, and what it means to become the latter. I summarize them here in (partly) my own words.

1. A committance to slavery is a committance to absolute obedience in case of given orders, regardless of what the slave himself thinks of it, what he wants himself or how he feels himself at the moment.

2. A slave gives himself over to the control of his Master as completely as is humanly possible. This means that there is actually a chattel property context to the relationship; the slave becomes literally (by mutual agreement) the property of the Owner. In an extreme interpretation this even can mean that the slave can be sold by a Master to another.

3. A slave cannot say "No" without completely abrogating the very basis of the Master/slave agreement. In contrast tot the'"No" of a sub, the "No"'of a slave is a fundamental deal-breaker. There is no room for him to protest and resolve a conflict by way negotatiation as there is for an employee; a refusal to obedience for a slave is mutiny, which the Master has the right to punish in the way He likes. Slavery cannot function if the exclusive command authority of the Master is questioned.

I will just add to that for a realistic form of SM-slavery three modern-time conditions:

1. considering certain physical/moral/mental limits, that often will be stated in a slave-contract, that, to avoid disussions between Master and slave about the rights (and obligations) of the former and the obligations (and rights) of the latter is very advisable. Avoiding health-damage is an important point.

2. considering certain practical limits, dependend on the professional and social obligations of the slave in normal daily life, especially when not living in. Those limits may concern the hours of availability (a slave's job often will take him during office hours outdoors), the openly external visibality of the slave's slavery (when he's a banker he presumably will be less easy able to show a high studded leather slave-collar with a dog-tag plus big D-ring for attaching the leash in front and a heavy padlock in the neck above his suit, than when he's a punk band musician in an artistic encironment), and the way both Master and slave will behave when interacting in the presence of others outside the SM-community (bootlicking as the automatical form of saluting the former by the latter might not be as clear as noon at a birth-day party when all your grandparents are present).

3. considering vertain temporal limits. Again: be realistic! How unromantic the thought may bsound, and completely square to the dreams of 'real slavery' and inborn mindset from the side of the slave (dreams I do share too!): there must always - otherwise it would be an illegal deprivation of liberty - for the slave exist the possibility to end the relationship. Which, indeed, than means the end - contrary to submissiveness, which is intended for a very limited period and limited role beforehand. This may also set a limit to the real possibility for an Owner to sell His slave to another Master: if there's no klick between both, the relationship will soon end, or beter: not even really start.

But when those limits are considered, indeed the essential demand for the slave is contained by just one sigle word: OBEY!

I will start to present my second life as a slave by the way of a kind of posters showing me with appropriate comments and commands